Morale Low

Scheduled to work from 12-8pm.
Woke up at 12.15pm.
Called Sambuca Lover to inform him.
What in the world was his reply.
Oh damn. Rushed and cabbed down to Sentosa.
Reached at 1.15pm.
Sectioned at beach. Hell. The day is fucking warm. Nevermind.
PS at beach bar, so it's only Kel, Famous Gross and myself on the floor at the beach.
But Kel was on the deck most of the time till much later, leaving just two of us on the floor, with occasional help from PS.
Many guests. Damn. Bar slow, cashiering slow. I... tired and distracted. What the hell?
2 run away bills and 1 lost bill. Cheesebuns these people who left without paying.
Fed up, tired and overwhelmed. Bitched to PS and cried.
I was sunbed mattress carrier of the day.
Can't believed how I lost my cool and broke down in front of The Boy.
How could I have revealed the vulnerable side of myself? How could I have exposed my weakness? I appreciate his concern but that's only cos it was work related. Work. The word "WORK", I abhor.
Nobody understands what I am going through.
Loneliness in school, pressure from daddy, financially burdened, stress at work, catch no ball in studies, trying to juggle so many things with very much limited time on hand.
I cry myself to sleep each night in Hall, hoping things will brighten up for me.
People who see me in class for the first time thought I was one hostile unfriendly person. So misunderstood. All they see is a shell who looks cool on the outside but completely frazzled on the inside.
Sigh. Tears are flowing out again as I talk to The Boy.